The Bleaching Interviews!
by Tox-sama
Summary: Mr. Interviewer in lack of better name will be interviewing characters from Bleach for your entertainment! First up is Ayasegawa Yumichika! If you want to ask a question, leave it in a review! There will be no pairings, but mentions of some.


**Interview with the prettiest Shinigami of them all, he is sparkling, he is beautiful, and he knows it…. Here is ****Yumichika Ayasegawa!**

**Interviewer: **It's great to have you here, Mr. Ayasegawa!

**Yumichika: **Obviously.

**Interviewer: **Okay… not the usual reply… Err, anyway, why don't you tell us something about yourself that _Bleach_ doesn't tell us?

**Yumichika: **I haven't read _Bleach_, but does it do me justice? I mean am I clearly displayed as ultimate beauty incarnate? Does it really give me all the attention I deserve? Is my hair shown as shiny enough? Are my graceful moves that graceful, or are they seen as more dull?

**Interviewer: **Well… You are not the main character, you know… You are portrayed as beautiful, but-

**Yumichika: **_B-but_?!? Is there a "but"? A doubt in my beauty? Is there, really?!

**Interviewer: **(Oh god) Of course not! Your beauty is shown in the manga, don't worry. So is there anything else…?

**Yumichika: **I am the one doing all the work in my division. It's frustrating, because to work so much you need much beauty sleep to remain beautiful, and there is not much time for that…

**Interviewer: **If I may ask, why are you the only one working?

**Yumichika: **Captain doesn't like to work, and you can't rely on our lieutenant. I couldn't possibly force all work onto Ikkaku, so it's gotta be me.

**Interviewer: **Why can't you push the work on someone of lower rank then?

**Yumichika: **Their handwritings are all so messy! It looks so ugly, I can't stand it, so if someone else does the job I end up rewriting it with my beautiful style anyway…

**Interviewer: **Ah… I see… I am sorry if this question might offend you, but a lot of fans want to know… Are you gay?

**Yumichika: **Isn't it obvious? I am pansexual, thank you very much.

**Interviewer: **… and that means?

**Yumichika: **I appreciate beauty in any form.

**Tox: **Even in the form of a vase? Or snow? Oh, or a cherry tree!

**Yumichika: **Obviously only people, silly girl.

**Interviewer: **So it's like being bisexual then?

**Yumichika: **No! A bisexual would be able to love anyone, those ignorant ugly fools… A pansexual only loves those who are beautiful! Is it such a hard concept for you to grasp?

**Interviewer: **I am sorry… I am sure your bisexual fans like you calling them ugly…

**Yumichika: **Like I'd care what an ugly person thought of me, unless the thought was "he's so gorgeous", of course.

**Interviewer: **Ah… I see… Are you in a committed relationship?

**Yumichika: **Are you asking me out?

**Interviewer: **No! I was just asking-

**Yumichika: **Me out, yes. I am sorry, but you're too ugly. Even being in this interview with you is enough.

**Interviewer: **… Thank you. I was asking if you were in a committed relationship, a lot of people has been wondering and-

**Yumichika: **Ah, of course a lot of people have been wondering whether I am available or not, being beautiful like this it is only natural. I am actually in a committed relationship, heh, like _**I **_could possibly be single!

**Interviewer: **May I ask… who is the… "lucky" fellow?"

**Yumichika: **You kind of answered your own question right there.

**Interviewer: **… I have no clue who you are talking about. And we won't find out either, because now the interview is done! Thank you for-

**Yumichika: **Wait! You can't end it like this, it's so sudden, how ugly! Don't just ignore me-

**- End -**

**Tox: **This was my first interview, with my favourite character Yumichika ^^ Next up will be my next favourite character, Aizen-sama! If you want to ask him a question, leave it in the review and he will answer it!

I think I'll do another one with Yumichika as well, if anyone wants to ask him a question I didn't ask... This one was just for a test ^^

Have a beautiful day ^^


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